No Funny Business, Just Funny People

I've got my first scheduled appearance to testify in court.

yeah.

For those of you who aren't getting the implied sarcasm, it's there. This is no small case either, not like somebody protesting a ticket or anything. I'm talking about a shooting. Drive by. Yeah. I'll sound like such an idiot up there. I'm just imagining some scene from "Law and Order" where the cop gets ripped up on the stand. Wish me luck I guess.

And that brings me to my next order of business. Gangsters. Or wanna be gangsters at that. This town is full of them (The latter mostly.) Guys wearing the pants almost to their knees, their baseball hat's cocked to the side, and 808 Bass pumping from out of the crappy sound system in their 1988 Chevy Caprice. Low ride of course.

I guess sometimes I just don't get it. I stop this young gentlemen who has a few tattoos on his neck and arms. His name is already in our system as a gangster, but behind his XXL Jeans I'm thinking he seems like he'd be a good kid! He's very respectful calling my partner and I "Ma'am" and "Sir." But I have to remember that once the tables turn, if he had a chance, he could/would hurt either one of us.

That is the way we are taught to think. Everyone, even the most respectful person, could hurt or kill us if the situation was right and it became necessary to their advantage. I know this sounds sadistic but it is how a cop must think if they are expected to survive and expect the unexpected. So please don't think I've become a paranoid, pessimistic type of person. It's just the nature of the job.

Will this constant guarded type of personality I've taken on affect my relationship with others? Probably, but at least my husband knows what's going on in my little head (for the most part!) That way we can deal with things together. Some people may think that a job dealing with suicides, broke junkies, and husbands and wives fighting like 10 year olds would be depressing or discouraging. But I have to tell you: It's been one of the most fun, eye opening experiences I've ever encountered!

Greys Anatomy Addiction

So I have just become officially obsessed with the show "Greys Anatomy." I started watching the seasons on DVD. Of course, "Dr. McDreamy" doesn't hurt. I have gotten the biggest crush on Patrick Dempsey on this show. Ivan and I were watching some episodes last night and I would just smile every time the hot doctor came on the screen! Ivan just thought I was a big dork. Oh well, I know I'm not the only girl who's in love with him. But I am excited there is another good show on TV. I don't watch much TV, I'm usually at work anyway. The only show I've gotten into lately was "Life" and I think they took that off the air! Those bums!

Finiculi Finicula Chef Burtoni's Kitchen

Well another weekend has past and again I felt like I didn't get much accomplished.

Ivan was out traveling for his new job. I was home alone and somehow turned into a huge nerd. I played XBOX Live all weekend. I stayed up to 4 a.m. drinking can after can of diet coke, all while trying to play Call of Duty against teenage boys who play way to often.

I did have to go into work for five hours today. It was shotgun and handgun training. Nothing to bad. It was kind of fun, we had to jump out of our cars and shoot at targets on the beep. It's nothing like they show on the movies though, however it's pretty great getting paid to do that kind of stuff!

On another note, This weekend I turned into my dad! I don't know what came over me. When Ivan came home I decided I wanted to cook him an awesome dinner. Now, about the only thing I know how to cook is Ramen Noodles and homeade calzones (homeade dough and everything.)This time I wanted to try an awesome calzone that was more authentic italian cuisine than the type of calzones I normally bake.

My dad, who made me believe I was Italian until about Freshmen year of high school, taught me the most important thing when cooking Italian food is to have on Italian music. So in his footsteps I had some Pavarotti cranked, blowing out the speakers. Flour is getting thrown around the kitchen as I poorly try to toss the dough like a true Italian. However, in the end I ended up with a nice tasting pesto calzone. One of my favorite yet! Ivan liked it too, thank goodness!

As for the Pavarotti, Ivan just thought I was a little nuts as I bellowed out "Finiculi Finicula" at the top of my lungs, and repeated the two words over and over again.

6 Completely Random Facts

That Most People Don't Know About Me:

1. I usually don't shave my legs until the weekend. (Poor Ivan)


2. Out of every book I start to read, I finish about 25% of them.


3. I feel extremely guilty about sleeping in.


4. Once upon a time I could recite "X-Men, The Movie" word for word.


5. I hate onions, but I love onion rings.


6. I get major crushes on wierd, dorky movie stars. People you wouldn't expect, like Greg Kinear.

Five little things that I can't live without....

1. Diet Coke

Ahhhhh... The refreshment. I drink to much. I should be in a Diet Coke Anonymous Program. At least the homeless guy who digs through my recycling bin get's allot of cans. So in a way I am helping out the community.

2. Bath and Body Works Hand Soap

I love this stuff! Their sales are great. That is when I stock up. Try Japanese Cherry Blossom or Brown Fig. I know realistically my hands would be just as clean with an 89 cent bar of soap, but this stuff is just too good!

3. Zune

Ok ok, I can't say I am completely inamorate of how my Mp3 player actually operates, but I definetly could not live without it! I love music so how could I go without portable tunes?

4. Tillamook Mudslide

If you have Tillamook ice cream available to you, and your not watching what you eat, I highly recommend picking up a quart of this stuff. The Mudslide is to die for. They don't skimp on their chocolate fudge. There are huge chunks of soft chocolate drizzle! Yummy!

5. Kleenex with Lotion

Who would have ever thought facial tissue would have made it on my list? I'll tell you what. Coming from a girl who grew up in a house where we had the scratchiest, cheapest toilet paper available, discovering tissues with lotion was the best thing that ever happened to me. Especially during hay fever season or when I'm sick. No more dry cracking nose!

(p.s. sorry about the formatting of this post. I have tried about 10 times now to fix it but the program won't let me!)

Man on Fire

This evening, as I was driving with my sirens wailing, I wondered how could people possibly be so crazy? Well, actually I was thinking first and foremost: This is going to be nuts. Secondly, I was wondereing about the crazy thing.

Oh yes, Did I mention I was driving to find a guy who poured gasoline over his head then lit himself on fire? How could I forget.

This poor kid. Only 16 years old and screwed up as ever.

This town is just notorious for white trash and all that comes with it. It's got 19 year old kids selling dope in the parks to 16 year olds.

Me and Ivan sat down to breakfast this morning and started to discuss the way our little town's society is. My views have definitly changed. Not just from being a cop, but just from getting older. I use to almost consider myself somewhat of a socialist! I thought everyone should get their share of money, food, wealth, etc.

My views have changed drastically.

On welfare: One year cap, and the reciever must show LEGITAMATE job endevours.

Can I even convey to you the reality of welfare, how I've seen a completely different side than I ever thought before? The majority of people I assist are on welfare. They don't know how to handle their own problems. They expect someone else to come in and take care of the hard stuff. They want to live with food, money, and ciggerates...all without working. Thier houses smell like moldy milk, cat crap, and weeks and weeks of dirty clothes. The floors are not covered with carpet, they are covered with old clothes, old newspapers, and TV dinner trash. The kids do not know what it is to respect their elders, or any authority for that matter. They call us "Po-Po" as their parents whisper things in thier ear to train them early for disliking law enforcment. They flip us the bird. They are too young to know what it is but the loving parents they have tell them to do it because, well it's plain funny. The kids grow up with magazines of porn lying around the house, along with dirty needles and childmolesters.

Days like these I am thankful for my parents who raised all 12 of us just right!

I heard that if you take an upper-middle class family and a family on welfare, switch their situations around, each family will be back where they were at originally within the year. Do you think that's true?

Hiking

Ivan and I went for a hike this weekend....

Well attempted.

He was so cute with wanting to suprise me with the hiking location. But with a suprise comes an unprepared hiker. It rained and I didn't have my rain coat. Oh well. That was minimal.

He decided to take me to Colville National Forest and we did some hiking there. He wanted to take a short cut. Must I go into detail?

An hour and a half later we get to our destination.

We start our hike. It's pretty, it's warm weather even with the occasional rain drops. My dog, Akai, is loving it.

Then I ask, "Isn't this bear country up here? Should we be making alot of noise to scare of the bears and cougers?" He tells me we should be fine. He is just trying to convince me not to be worried though he is just as worried as I am.

20 minutes into the hike I see a bear paw print....then another. These things are huge.

I'm a bit nervous, Ivan is too.

We decide to call it quits and come back again when we are properly equipped.

Bells to ward off animals, bear spray and a gun....just in case.

Oh well, it was a fun little road trip and I got an ice cream cone on the way back.